Love of my life,
I have been thinking a lot lately. About you, about me, and about what we are capable of. I guess it started when I was reading about the potential of people and how it is usually wasted as people frantically look to support their many bills in life. You see when I first met you I thought I had something to prove in this world. I thought, like most people that I had to work really really really hard to get a good job so I earned lots and lots of money so that everyone would think that I was really interesting. I guess what I wanted was just, what most men consider, winning at life. Having an expensive car, a giant house, a commanding respect from his family, I suppose these are the things that most people look for in life; along with myself.
Then I met you, and I would like to say I felt like those things were not important. That all of a sudden, in your eyes I found something that meant more to me than all the money in the world. But sadly, that wasn't what happened. Instead I sat and I listened to you tell me about all the places you wanted to travel to, all the places you wanted to live. You described a living room in a castle in Scotland, a dinning room perched on top of a mountain over looking the ocean, a bedroom high in the trees, deep in a forest next to a river. All these things I would add up in my head and think, for someone I love so much how could I tell her no? Obviously, I just need to work harder. Not to mention, you don't get a beautiful, talented, funny, strong, courageous girl like you by not being able to buy things.
But I can look around and see my friends, they grow up so fast. Matt and adam already starting the treadmill that makes you run faster and faster till you wake up 65 without having any time for those you loved or the lessons you learned along the way. Or like Alex nicole or chris even that feel like they need more money to feel successful. So far is the belief that money=success that I see my peers throwing away such precious time to get it. Only to find that it means they need more.
But I sell our partnership short when I think that. Because what makes us great isn't that fact that we want things. What makes us great is that we dream together. John Lennon said 'when you dream alone, it is just a dream. When you dream together it is a reality.'
You see, we have an amazing ability, you and I. When we close our eyes, and we put our heart together, we can dream up anything we want. Because once we dream it, we can make it. I can't promise you that we will have a living room in Scotland. But we can build a castle. We can build it ourselves out of clay bricks. We can build it in the mountains, or near the ocean, or in a meadow. I can't promise you we can always afford the very best and fresh food. But I can promise that we can grow it for ourselves and every morning pick it together. What we don't know how to grow, we can learn. We can start farmers markets to sell our extras and make sure other people are eating well too. Maybe take it round to older couples homes and bring them food in exchange for tea and stories of when they were kids. I can't promise that we will always have prestige and status. But I can tell you, you will always have my undivided attention, respect, love.
What I am trying to say is, there are very few times in your life when you find such a powerful partnership that allows you to conquer so much. So slowly I learned that my priorities were mixed up. Because when I came on to this world, the only thing I came with was time. And time is the one thing I can't get back. By extension, in the end, time was the only thing that will mean anything to me. What I mean to say I don't want to be rich and powerful to give you all those things you talk about. But I have all the time in the world so lets close our eyes, start with the first thing and start working with a tenacity that can only come from us. What I mean to say is, what people out there are selling, is no way near as amazing as what we can make. So I am not buying, I just want my time with you to be kids, and dream.
I hope someday you'll join me....
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