It is sometimes silly how practical I can be. I realize I absolutely love organization, order, and self sustaining systems. When something comes across my desk, I can feel my brain instantly starting to unravel its nature. I start to break it down, tear it apart, see how it functions and put it back together. I do this so I can test it, see how it works, and how to integrate it in to other systems. It is interesting because the approach works on many levels for many different things. Once I have it files, sorted, and hopefully self sustaining I can leave it alone and count it as done.
Perhaps it is why business interests me, real estate, stocks, and investments all interest me. I can look at a statement sheet, try to break it down, put it back together and add it to my system so I don't have to think about it ever again while it slowly does its thing. The more systems you can have running at once almost becomes a symphony on complex systems. A machine built one part at a time. Each piece delicate and exact and in balance with the rest. Each part practical, efficient, purposeful, and specifically created.
And then I feel like Rose walks in, and my strategy goes down the tubes. It is amusing how different we think. We she pushes something in to my mind, I instantly start building a system around it, incorporating it. I start breaking it down and building it back up to fit in to what I know and already have. And I feel she comes in and rips it back out to show me what it would taste like, smell like, feel like to do. To just live in that idea for a moment. Perhaps it is something beyond my powers, perhaps I just lost imagination when I was younger to the point where I am all work. I am not sure the reason, but some how she was blessed with the ability to just sit and enjoy something regardless of the purpose, the ability to accomplish, regardless of anything she is just there to enjoy the very special gift of that idea.
While I am busy thinking about the practical side of things, she has almost completely lived through it and is ready for the next idea to create in her world. Perhaps it has been a point of tension at times, but I believe it may also be a point of salvation on my part.
What lies down my path without imagination? What could possible be the goal that I will accomplish. Will I simply be an old man, left fiddling with a machine until the day it is done and I am able to leave it. What then? I will give a shrug and turn off the lights as I leave the room on my life's work that generates little more than a soft “hmm” and a nod from the rare person that happens to stumble into that room and relish in my masterpiece of systems, safeguards, leverages, and automations.
The value in both views can't be denied and perhaps I should be much more welcoming of those breaks that Rose presents. When my eyes are strained from numbers, networks, and linear movement, maybe I can stop and close them to imagine the world the Rose lives in. Where possibility is endless, lifetimes are lived in a day, dreams come true, and paradise is build before you realize you have created it.
I hope you share your world with me more often Rose, there is much to learn there, and lord knows I could use a break. I love you soo much sweetheart, you are my strength. I can't wait to see you.
With you, anything is possible
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